Being adoptive parents to a wonderful child (or children) is one of the most exciting times in a family and a person’s life. Not only is this a unique experience, but this is also one filled new moments and memories that everyone can look back to with fondness over time.
Although adoption has become a new norm in society, there are still complexities that each member or adoptive parent will go through. No matter how prepared you are for the arrival of your child into your life, there will always be curveballs that will be thrown your way.
While there is no set experience for families and children alike, preparing for the arrival and parenting of an adopted child (or children) is essential. Below are some helpful tips for adoptive parents who are keen on successfully navigating the process of raising an adopted child.
Officially Welcome the Child to the Family
It’s important to formalize the welcoming or the arrival of your child. After all, it is a celebration that lets them know they are loved and wanted by many people. However, if you are going to hold a gathering, make sure to start with a more intimate celebration with your immediate family.
Refraining from holding huge celebrations can be overwhelming and stressful, especially as your child is still adjusting to new their new home. Friends, family, and relatives who wish to send their regards may do so at a later date.
One way you can welcome the child is to let your biological children (if any) know that a new child will be joining you at home ahead of time. Introducing your adoptive child to your biological child is important. One way to familiarize themselves with the newest child is through playtime or a bonding session, such as a date in the park or a trip to the museum.
You can also do the same bonding time with your child by asking them what they want to do and spending time with them one-on-one. This will give your child the freedom to express themselves and allow you to gain more knowledge about their hobbies and interests in return.
Talk About Adoption and the Adoption Process
There are no two same adoption stories. To help your child become familiar with their story and help them be in the know about the whole adoption process, make sure to collate all documents and photographs in a scrapbook or a photobook.
Personal anecdotes, tidbits, and other essential information such as their birth parents, the hospital, or place they were born in, the experiences they have had (such as being welcomed by family and friends) can all a role in your scrapbook.
By talking about their origins, ethnicity, and the like, adoptive parents can help fight the stigma surrounding adoption. Furthermore, these figures can also foster a sense of trust and openness from the very beginning.
Free Yourself from Expectations
Adoptive parents, just like all other parents, have certain expectations about what they hope their children will be. While we all want the best for our child, the truth is, every child will be different, and their adoption process and experience will play a significant role in how they grow up.
While babies and toddlers who are adopted at a young age do fairly well, those who are institutionalized for a longer period of time, especially older children or even teenagers, may have different issues relating to their institutionalism.
To help them adapt well, make sure to extend patience and be appreciative of who they are now. Give them room to breathe and be their own person, especially at a crucial time when they are reckoning with who they are. Keep answering their questions and also cut yourself some slack from time-to-time.
The Bottom Line
No amount of advice or helpful tips can make adoptive parents fully ready for the journey they’re about to go through. However, with these essentials, you can pave a smoother road towards raising your adopted child and making them feel part of the family.
